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Meg

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I get my kicks below the waistline, sunshine.


Meg
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Meet Cute, part eight!

Part eight! Because it would be unfair to deprive you of porn for all that long.

ETA: This part includes a rather ill-advised scene. Everything works out all right, but I'm putting up this warning for full disclosure.

Links to the whole series:

Part One · Part Two · Part Three · Part Four · Part Five · Part Six · Part Seven · Part Seven · Part Eight · (Ongoing)



Jared stared at his phone. 6:22. If he was going to make this call, it had to be soon, or else Jensen would be so close it'd be silly not to just talk when he got there, which was the reason for calling in the first place.

He dialed, and Jensen picked up on the fifth ring. "Hey."

Jared closed his eyes. "Hey." He leaned forward to rest his forehead, warm and sweaty after a five-mile run, against the door of the fridge. "I wanted to talk with you. Uh, before you came over."

There was a long pause, and then the sound of the engine cutting off. "Okay," Jensen said carefully.

"It's nothing bad," Jared said. He debated the intelligence of having a beer. One or two probably wouldn't hurt. "I just- I had a shitty day at work. Like, really shitty."

"Okay," Jensen said again.

"I, um." Jared took a breath. He knew it was generally frowned upon to take out your frustrations on your boyfriend, but he was hoping the rules would be a little different in their case. "I want to hurt you, and I don't want to have to be nice about it."

"Oh." The line went so quiet Jared almost thought it was dead. "I have to work tomorrow."

Jared stepped away from the fridge. He'd wait until after they were done to have a drink. "I can work around that."

The engine revved to life. "I'll be there in ten minutes," Jensen said.

***

Jared barely had time to change his clothes and pick out the things he wanted to use before Jensen was there, knocking briefly before letting himself in.

"Hi," he said with a small smile. "Bad day, huh?"

"Yeah." Jared leaned in for a kiss, wishing he didn't feel like putting his hand through a wall so he could just enjoy the next few hours. "Sorry."

"Not your fault." Jensen set his stuff down, raised an eyebrow at the pile of rope on the floor. "You want to do this now?"

"If that's okay?"

"Fine with me," Jensen said, peeling off his jacket and shirt. "Just make sure I eat before I pass out."

"Promise," Jared said. He felt a little guilty, mixing up his desire to hurt someone with his desire to hurt Jensen, because they weren't the same. Not at all. But Jensen was here, and truth be told he was exactly what Jared needed right now: someone who liked pain just enough to let him do this, not quite enough to enjoy it.

As soon as Jensen was naked, Jared tied a blindfold over his eyes. Normally he preferred to scene without them, loved watching Jensen's pretty eyes as he begged and cried and came, but tonight he didn't want Jensen's attention anywhere but his own body and whatever Jared put him through. If he'd had the equipment, Jared would have tried to block his hearing, gone for full sensory deprivation. Maybe another time.

Jensen must have been off-balance already, because when Jared asked him for his hands it took a good few seconds for him to offer them up.

"Don't push tonight," Jared warned as he tied Jensen's hands behind his back. He didn't want to be tempted to go any further than he was already planning.

Jensen bowed his head. "Yes, sir," he said, all soft and contrite. "Sorry."

"It's all right," Jared said. He strapped a cock ring on him, tight enough to keep Jensen nice and hard no matter what, then gave his dick a few quick strokes. Once Jensen's breath started to hitch and his cock was thick and full, Jared slipped another ring on him: a vibrating one, with a little silver bullet that Jared positioned right under the head of Jensen's dick.

From the whimper Jensen gave, the placement wasn't lost on him. Jared was torn between reassuring him that he'd be fine and rubbing it in that yes, Jensen was going to get off that way and no, he wasn't going to like it.

In the end he did neither, just brushed his thumb over the little drop of pre-come brimming from Jensen's slit. "Come on."

He led Jensen into the kitchen-slash-dining room, the only space in his apartment with wood floors, and didn't feel the least bit guilty for wishing he was using a collar and leash to do it. A dark, ugly voice in his head, the same one that had been picking at him all afternoon, said that if he tried it right now, when Jensen couldn't see it coming, Jensen wouldn't object to being collared. Would probably even like it.

You saw him, the voice said. He wants it.

Jared entertained the thought long enough to get a real nice picture in his head, then cast it aside. There was pain, and there was damage, and Jared knew which one he was after.

"Stop," he said when he had Jensen standing just where he wanted him. Jensen stopped, the muscles in his shoulders tense and his breaths coming fast. Jared held him by the upper arms, kept him steady. "If you need to safeword, do it. Don't hold out for me."

Jensen nodded. "Okay," he said, though Jared knew he probably would, would bite his lip and tell himself he could wait until Jared was through. What Jensen didn't know was that Jared had no intention of stopping until Jensen made him.

But he wasn't about to tell Jensen that. "Kneel."

Jensen obeyed, dropping down without an encouraging push, but he only got one leg on the floor before he froze. "What-"

Jared's hands went to Jensen's shoulders to keep him from rising. "It's fine, it's just rice. Put your other leg down."

There was no way, before Jensen had come over, for him to know what Jared was planning. Not that he usually knew Jared's plans, unless he had a new toy or special request, but usually he knew that whatever Jared had in store, he would like it. That didn't make it any less arousing when he sank to his knees or offered up his wrists for restraints without a second thought. But watching him bite his lip and set his other knee down on the floor, knowing this was going to be the kind of pain that had nothing to do with pleasure? That was- Jared didn't have words for what that was. That was almost enough to make him pull Jensen to his feet and into the bedroom because who cared about some asshole at work when you had Jensen Ackles naked and willing to do whatever you wanted?

But if Jensen was going to let him, Jared was going to see this through. It wasn't likely to last long anyway: there was nothing fun about a few dozen grains of rice digging into Jensen's knees, no way for him to process it as something that made his dick hard. Which was why it was going to be so much fun to make him come like this anyway.

"Don't sit down," he told Jensen, whose bound hands were tightened into fists behind his back, "and don't try to get up." Then he kissed Jensen's bare shoulder, turned on the vibrating cock ring, and sat back to enjoy the show.

Jensen didn't disappoint. He curled forward, as though that would do anything to cease the vibrations, and shouted as his shifting weight forced the rice deeper into his skin. His arms jerked like he'd forgotten he couldn't use them to brace himself, and for a moment Jared thought he might fall to the floor. But he managed to catch himself before he toppled over, stomach going taut as he struggled to pull himself upright and stay balanced.

"Holy shit," Jensen whispered, panting like he'd just sprinted forty yards. "Shit. Shit." He was still moving, tiny little attempts to find a less agonizing position, and his erection was as hard as ever. God, Jared should have thought to set up a camera, get this on film so he could jerk off to it forever.

Finally Jensen settled, body still from the waist down, lips pressed to a white line. Jared had some idea of what he was feeling: he'd felt it once himself, when he was new and stupid and thought you had to be cracking a whip to cause real pain. The dom in the scene he'd been watching, Meredith, had laughed and offered to show him just how wrong he was. He'd only made it through three minutes, and all he remembered of them were his vision whiting out and the makeitstopmakeitstopmakeitstop loop running over and over in his head.

Jensen was probably going to beat his time. Then again, Jared hadn't had a vibrator strapped to his dick pushing him towards an uncomfortable orgasm. He pulled his own dick out of his pants, stroking slowly to hold off as long as he could.

Jensen's hips started hitching in under a minute, body rocking though he tried to keep still. He was hurting, he had to be hurting, but the only proof was the little gasps escaping his mouth with each involuntary movement. His whole body was flushed, sweat shining on his forehead and chest, and his cock was a furious red. Jared wanted to touch him all over, make him curse and cry out and come and then do it all over again until he could no longer hold himself up.

Three minutes in, Jensen's thrusts took on a familiar rhythm. "Jared," he said, sharp and scared, "Jared." And then he came, mouth twisting in pain as he shot all over Jared's kitchen floor.

Jensen probably thought that was going to be it, that Jared was going to let him go now that he'd come. He was wrong. Jared tightened his hand around the base of his cock as he watched Jensen whimper through the aftershocks, trying to hold off his own orgasm. He wasn't finished yet.

Jensen bit down on his bottom lip like that could distract him from everything that was happening below his waistline. It couldn't, of course; it might cut through the pain for a moment, but the pain wasn't going anywhere. It would still be there when Jensen returned from whatever brief vacation he thought he was taking.

Sure enough, a helpless little sound soon escaped from Jensen's lips, and then another, and then his body went taut as he came again.

Jared still didn't turn off the ring.

"Jared," Jensen whined, legs shaking. "Jared, I can't-"

"Don't sit down," Jared warned him, stroking himself a little faster.

Jensen dropped his chin to his chest, defeated, but he didn't sit down. Jared almost wanted to take the blindfold off; if he did, Jensen would be looking directly at the hard-on he didn't want and couldn't get rid of, no many how many times he came. Shit. Just the thought made Jared's own dick pulse in his hand. Add in the the wounded, desperate look Jensen would be sure to give him, and he nearly came right then.

"Turn it off," Jensen whispered, and Jared could picture his face, his eyes closed and brimming with tears. "Please turn it off."

Jensen hated vibrators. He hated them on his nipples, in his ass, and especially on his dick. He said he hated the way they made him feel, hot and shaky and numb, and Jared knew that was most of the reason. He also knew Jensen had an ex whose fondness for them might have been sadistic in more ways than one.

"No," Jared said, his whole body burning with pleasure.

Jensen sucked in a breath in tiny spurts, like he couldn't take that much air at once. Jared froze, thinking that was it, Jensen was going to call it off, and the room was completely silent for a moment. But Jensen only let the breath out, as slowly and shakily as he'd taken it in, and said, "please."

Jared swallowed. "No," he said again, softer this time, but more final.

"I can't," Jensen said, shaking his head as his legs trembled, "I can't- I can't-" And in the pauses between his stuttered, fragmented pleas, Jared could hear the buzz of the vibrator.

Jensen's third orgasm was all but dry and accompanied by a wrenching sob that pulled Jared down with him, come spattering his jeans and hand. He came so hard he barely heard Jensen's renewed attempts at begging.

"Stop," Jensen said for the first time all night, like he had any reason to believe Jared would listen. "Jared, stop it, stop- just turn if off," he cried, and Jared could taste the tears in his voice. "Jared, stop, I can't- red. Red."

Jared was on him in an instant, pulling him off his knees and into Jared's lap. "Turn it off," Jensen gasped, kicking his legs like he could fight off the pain. "God, just get it off."

Jared flipped the switch on the ring, then reached down further to brush away the grains of rice that had embedded themselves in Jensen's knees. Jensen was tense all over, breaths coming out wet and awful, and Jared didn't want anything other than to hold him close and shush him quiet.

"You're okay," he whispered into the blindfold hiding Jensen's temple. "It's all right, you were perfect, you're okay."

"Am not," Jensen finally said. "My legs hurt."

Jared laughed and helped Jensen to his feet. "I know, I'm sorry," he said as he worked open the knots holding Jensen's hands behind his back. "Would a bath help?"

"Yeah," Jensen said, sighing with relief as he brought his arms in front of him. "That would be- that would be- yeah."

Jared turned him around, tucked Jensen's head into his shoulder, then slid the blindfold off him. "Okay," he said softly, "come on."

***

They'd been soaking in the tub for half an hour, Jensen leaning back against Jared's chest, before Jared found the nerve to say anything.

"Hey," he said, running a hand through Jensen's wet hair. "I know that wasn't- what you want. But I needed, I don't know, something, and all I could-"

"Shut up," Jensen mumbled.

Jared's brain went blank. "Uh. What?"

"I said shut up. Don't apologize." Jensen turned his head a bit so Jared could reach the spots just above his neck.

"But-" Jared started.

Jensen sighed, then pushed up enough to look back at him. "I can do this, okay? If you need it, I can do it. I want to." His eyes dropped, then lifted up to meet Jared's again. "If you want to, I want to."

For a few minutes, Jared forgot how to do anything other than kiss Jensen to within an inch of his life. "I love you," he said when they pulled apart.

"I know you do," Jensen said blithely, but there was no way to hide the smile that broke out over his face. "Now go make me a sandwich."

"Okay," Jared said, laughing and tugging Jensen down to lay back against him again.

"Seriously," Jensen said, "I'm starving." But he let Jared wrap his arms around him, and didn't say another word until the water went cold.

*


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Woah. Fuck. That really walked a line I didn't even know I had, because ... how to put this? If I started a scene in that frame of mind I think things would get very, very ugly. Yikes.

Oh, I'm sorry about that. You're right, Jared starts the scene in a very bad state of mind. I hope it didn't go too far over the line for you?

(Deleted comment)
Thank you so much! I'm glad you thought so. ♥

First off--YAY! More Meet Cute! Second: OMG. I was not expecting that at all. I was expecting more caning or something, I don't even know. But then it was *psychological* and sneaky hurt, not out and out pain, and just . . . wow. I love that you didn't do what I expected and poor Jensen and oh, Jared, what will we do with you?

YAY indeed! I've been too busy to write for a few months, so it was tons of fun to get back to this. :D

Yes! It's a different kind of hurt this time around. I wanted to go somewhere I hadn't been before. It was tough on both of them, but I'm pretty sure they'll come out all the stronger for it, with even more trust between them.


WOW ..... That's ... really .... yeah... you TRYING to kill me? WOW. I loved it. There is so much emotion and feeling in this. Thank you so much for updating this and giving us this porn.

I'm doing my best- why, is it working? :D

I'm so glad you liked it! That makes me very happy. I need to get better with updating. Months fall off the map and I don't even realize. From now on, top of my to-do list is 'write more porn.'

(no subject) - vanessawolfie, 2011-02-06 08:00 pm (UTC)(Expand)
Wow, what a treat this story is, and what a treat after such a long hiatus (meaning I had an excuse to reread from the beginning.)

Aw, thank you so much! ♥ (Hee, I'm glad you see it that way, but I've got to get better about updating. It's so nice to hear you're still reading after all this time!)

So, I read stories wrong. Clearly I should start with the most recent part.

I love this! Jensen being pushed to the brink but Jared's there to take care of him in the end. Aw, snuggling in the tub. And hot sex! <3

lol! Well, I'm not sure if that's true in general, but it might be here. The first part was just a silly thing that I wrote for the kink meme and then it was like, oh, I think I'll keep playing in this sandbox! I should probably go back and edit the first parts sometime. *g*

Thank you! I'm glad you haven't been scared off by my clearly pervy mind. (The snuggling in the tub is my favorite. I'm a sucker for aftercare.)

Okay, so that was amazing. Possibly more so because through a good half of it I wasn't sure I was going to be able to keep going because of the drive behind this scene.

I think it was particularly good because you dealt with that drive, admitted that it wasn't necessarily healthy or right to enter a scene because of that and then found a way to make it balenced because Jared still so obviously cared about Jensen, felt guilty even when he was turned on and comforted him afterwards and talked about it a little. I think it also made it more acceptable for me that it wasn't anything overtly physically violent, for some reason as painful as this obviously was it felt less of an abuse - that's not the right word but I think if Jared had been whipping or something similar then it would have felt more abusive, like their relationship had crossed a line I wouldn't have been comfortable with. God, I'm totally waffling and likely making no sense. But one last thing - I liked that Jared pushed Jensen to safe word, I love how much trust and care that kinda showed.

Aw, thank you hon! ♥ I'm so happy you were able to make it through, I would have felt awful if this part was too intense. :(

Yeah, this piece was tough, especially because I don't think Jared himself would have thought this was a good idea if you asked him any other day. He wouldn't want to do anything to put Jensen at risk. But it was a bad moment and he knew he had a way to deal and, to his credit, he was up-front about it and didn't pick anything with the potential to break skin or strain muscles. (And that was hard to find! Something painful with no lasting effects. I wish an e-stim machine would have been an option.) So I'm hoping that everyone else shares your opinion and doesn't think it crossed the line into abuse. *crosses fingers*


(no subject) - keerawa, 2011-02-07 06:16 am (UTC)(Expand)
(no subject) - coterminal, 2011-02-07 12:27 pm (UTC)(Expand)
I love these two very different ways Jared uses Jensen to get what he needs. And I love that Jensen gives both so freely, just from being asked. I also love how totally GONE Jared is over Jensen, so sweet.

Yeaaaahhhh, Jared can wait six months, but can I??

Me too! It's been fun to play with. I love the idea that they're in a place where Jared can ask Jensen for what he wants, whatever that happens to be. I'd be worried about it coming off like Jared pushing Jensen into things he doesn't want to do, but I think Jensen's pretty good at setting his limits. And of course Jared is too gone over him to ever hurt him. :D

I promise you won't have to wait six months!

I'm so excited that you updated this 'verse! You did a fabulous job at writing this scene. It was scarily intense and very hot! I love how careful Jared was in making sure he didn't step over the line of pain vs. damage. And you portrayed Jared's discomfort and guilt over his needing to cause that pain so beautifully. But what I really liked best was how Jensen accepted the pain without pleasure because he wanted to fulfill Jared's need. You've really grown the trust in these two characters. I look forward to the next installment.

Oh, thank you so much! It was exciting for me to update as well, I hate not having time to write. The give and take between these two is just so much fun, I love taking them to new places. And the next part is in the works right now!

Oh.my.god. I have no words for how awesome and out of control this bit is. NO WORDS.

The trust here is awesome. And I am so happy that you updated this verse!!!! I love love love this story and it is good to see more!!!! And to see that you are back writing again. (just caught up w/ parts 7 & 8)

Yay! Speechless is good. :D

Thank you! I'm happy I updated too, these boys are so much fun. And the next part is in the works!

Just wanted to say how much I love your writing. I don't really know how I got to your site anymore, but I'm glad I got here!!!!!!! I've friended you (hope you don't mind, it doesn't hurt really, not unless you want it to : ) Just want to keep track of your lovely fic.

You're writing is wonderful. Great stories and so much heat. They just hold together and the characters are so vivid and true to themselves. The whole Meet Cute is just awesome as Dean would say, they feel so well rounded and dimensional. Just want to read more about their relationship and where it's going.

I've also read everything else you've posted here and it's all beyond amazing. Man you've got talent and the fact that each story seems too short, just bears witness to how good it is that it goes by too fast.

Thanks for your lovely words, will be staying tuned.

Oh my goodness, what a lovely thing to say. I'm completely flattered right now. Thank you! And I don't mind at all that you've friended me. <3

Now I wish I had more posted here for you to read! And heh, the reason everything feels too short is probably because it is. :( But I'm glad you liked it all, and I will try to have more for you soon!


(no subject) - meus_venator, 2011-03-04 08:59 pm (UTC)(Expand)
I can't believe I haven't left feedback for this 'verse before!! I just recced it to a friend and stopped by for the link and was terribly abashed to find that I hadn't told you just how much I'm loving it! You've built a fabulous relationship here, with such complex levels of trust and uncertainty, love and care and intensity and a bit of danger. I hope you get the chance to go on with them, because so far it has been a fantastic ride. THANK YOU!



(ETA: The Chess song lyric perversion in your journal title brings me great glee. *g*)

Edited at 2011-03-06 11:10 pm (UTC)

That's quite all right! I'm awful with both updating and responding to feedback (though I'm trying to get better!) so I don't blame you for not leaving any. But I'm delighted to hear how much you're enjoying this verse, and so flattered that you liked it enough to rec. Thank you!

(Me too! Every time I see it I smile and the song starts playing in my head. *g*)

I'm here because of deirdre_c's rec, and I'm so happy to find this story! I was just complaining in my own journal about how difficult it was to find fanfic that had submission and/or pain play without humiliation, and how I was looking for D/s stuff with affectionate tops, and then boom, here this is! And I love it!

I have to admit, I'm here for the more schmoopy scenes, like the caning and, well, I could go on and on! I love how Jared is still this wiggly, happy guy and Jensen has that dry humor; I love watching Jared slowly figuring out what Jensen likes, how they navigate that learning process. This particular part was a bit scary, but I kind of loved how Jared called Jensen before he arrived, how he explained about his mental condition and really put a lot of the control in Jensen's hands, and I loved how even when Jared was feeling mean he didn't cross the line into doing things Jensen had explicitly told him not to do.

Thanks for such a good story! I'll totally be stalking your work! :D

Oh, then I'm happy you found it as well, and that deirdre_c was kind enough to rec it!

The schmoopy scenes are my favorite too! I'm enamored of the juxtaposition between happy, friendly guy and hardcore top and it's so much fun getting to write Jared as both. This part was rough, I know, because it stepped away from that, but I figure none of us can be happy-go-lucky all the time. plus this was a great way to build trust. It's not where I want to take the story as a whole, but it was an interesting one-time thing.

You're so welcome, thank you for reading! And eep, now I have to produce more work...

I'm usually pretty soft core when it comes to any form of BDSM, Dom/Sub etc. so this actually the first series I've read where I've seen so much of that type of world. I have to say when I started on this part of their story I was a bit uneasy with what Jared was asking him to do, and there was definitely a level of discomfort for me when Jared kept on going. But I'm glad I read through because I think as a reader I felt it paid off because Jared stopped when Jensen told him to. Also the fact that Jared asked him beforehand was one of the things that got me to read it because you know, that was him asking for something and not just taking it. And ultimately there was trust and affection which seemed to come out even more as a result of what happened here.

So, I guess what I'm saying is, well done and I'm still with you? XD Lovely work :)

I appreciate you giving this part a shot, especially when harder BDSM isn't your usual cup of tea. It's definitely meant to be unsettling- it's easy to trust someone on a good day, but what I wanted Jensen (and Jared) to get out of this was that Jared was worthy of the trust on any day, so it had to venture to more difficult terrain. I'm so happy you stuck through it, and that it hasn't put you off the rest of the story! I promise the next part will be much more fun to read. Thanks so much. :D

What a hot and schmoopy verse :) Awesome read!

Aw, thank you hon! I'm glad you thought so! <3

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